Learning How to Put Yourself First: Three Tips for Selfless People

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In a world where you sometimes meet selfish people, showing that you’re selfless and kind at heart is like a breath of fresh air. The world needs more people like you who can make time for others and who go out of their way to let them know that they are being cared for. This is because when negativity and hatred are all that’s left, selfless people can look like a silver lining.

But there’s a fine line between showing selflessness and allowing other people to take advantage of your kindness. You should learn how to set proper boundaries so that other people won’t have the chance to bring themselves up at your expense. You deserve more than to get used like that.

It can difficult to put your needs in front of others if that’s what you’re accustomed to, but it won’t hurt anyone to prioritize yourself for a change. You have to ensure that while you’re taking care of everyone around you, you’re also taking care of yourself. Practicing self-care can help you make those changes.

Change can be frightening, but it can also be good for your mind and body. Besides, you have to start somewhere so it might as well be for your own good. If you’ve lived your whole life tending to other people’s needs and not your own, here are three tips you can follow to change that:

Tip #1: Prioritize Your Health

When you can’t ignore the responsibilities weighing on your shoulders, you may keep putting those priorities before your own, even if it starts taking a toll on your health. You have to remember that you can’t take care of anyone if you’re under the weather, or worse, debilitated.

That’s why it’s important to prioritize your health before anyone else, unless, of course, the situation calls for your immediate attention. But if it’s not a matter of life and death, then you should give yourself enough room to breathe while devising a way to solve the issue at hand without compromising your health.

This includes your health in all aspects—emotional, physical, mental, spiritual, or even your oral health. For instance, you’ve been planning to get your crooked teeth straightened for the longest time, so you’ve been saving up part of your monthly salary for a few months to have enough budget for the procedure.

But suddenly, your friend asked to borrow some money because they wanted to buy some shoes they saw at the mall. Since your friend’s favor isn’t as urgent or important as your need to get clear aligners from a licensed orthodontic aligners lab, surely they won’t take it against you if you decline. That won’t make you selfish even if your friend thinks otherwise, especially because it’s your health on the line.

Tip #2: Pursue Your Passion


No matter how many responsibilities are weighing on your shoulders, you have to take some time to pursue your creativity and passions. That’s because a life that only revolves around work and making money is no way to live. You should allow yourself to enjoy the life you’ve worked so hard to have.

Pursuing your passions doesn’t mean that you’re going to neglect your responsibilities, but it gives you some breathing room to just be yourself without the burdensome titles attached to your name. When you’re doing what you love, you’re not the breadwinner or the hardworking employee; you’re just you.

Everyone should be allowed to just be themselves. And everyone deserves to express themselves through creative outlets, like singing, dancing, cooking, painting, or whatever it is that your heart desires. Don’t lose yourself in the process of providing and caring for others.

Tip #3: Practice Choosing Yourself

When you’ve lived your whole life at other people’s beck and call, it can be difficult to start choosing yourself. It can make you feel selfish for no longer wanting to be selfless, but it’s a necessary change. Most of all, it’s a way to regain the power you’ve lost while trying to please other people.

So even if you think that it’s next to impossible, consider choosing yourself when the situation allows it. You’re not going to be shamed for wanting to choose yourself for once, especially not when everyone around you has been doing so. Take a page from their book and do what will make you happy because you deserve it.

It’s important to strike a balance between being selfless and being selfish because too much of anything can be bad for anyone. You have to learn how to gauge whether the situation calls for your undivided attention and when you’re allowed to let others take the reins. Keep in mind that the weight of the world shouldn’t fall on your shoulders alone.


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